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Babysitting

OK so I haven't updated in forever and I don't remeber what happened since but this is good. Me and Boyer went to Stacey the school secretary in Ramat Eshkol for Shabbos. It's been fun, right before mincha she asked me to give her 2 1/2 year old son some soda so I gave him 2/4 of a cup. Then during shalasheudos he was being finicky so i gave him a cookie. Everyone knows how I like little kids.
After havdallah she was like do you guys mind babysitting and we were like sure. So the 2 and 1/2 year old kid tzvi just started crying that he wants his mommy. Boyer and me did the only sensible thing. We gave him cookies and let him jump on our bed!

HAHAHAHAHA

NORFOLK, Va. — Christian broadcaster Pat Robertson suggested Thursday that Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon's stroke was divine punishment for "dividing God's land."

"God considers this land to be his," Robertson said on his TV program "The 700 Club." "You read the Bible and he says `This is my land,' and for any prime minister of Israel who decides he is going to carve it up and give it away, God says, `No, this is mine."'

Sharon, who ordered Israel's withdrawal from Gaza last year, suffered a severe stroke on Wednesday.

In Robertson's broadcast from his Christian Broadcasting Network in Virginia Beach, the evangelist said he had personally prayed about a year ago with Sharon, whom he called "a very tender-hearted man and a good friend." He said he was sad to see Sharon in this condition.

He also said, however, that in the Bible, the prophet Joel "makes it very clear that God has enmity against those who 'divide my land."'

Sharon "was dividing God's land and I would say woe unto any prime minister of Israel who takes a similar course to appease the EU (European Union), the United Nations, or the United States of America," Robertson said.

In discussing what he said was God's insistence that Israel not be divided, Robertson also referred to the 1995 assassination of Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin, who had sought to achieve peace by giving land to the Palestinians. "It was a terrible thing that happened, but nevertheless he was dead," he said.

The Anti-Defamation League issued a statement urging Christian leaders to distance themselves from the remarks. Robertson made similar comments as the Gaza withdrawal occurred, it said.

"It is outrageous and shocking, but not surprising, that Pat Robertson once again has suggested that God will punish Israel's leaders for any decision to give up land to the Palestinians," said Abraham H. Foxman, national director of the group, which fights anti-Semitism. "His remarks are un-Christian and a perversion of religion. Unlike Robertson, we don't see God as cruel and vengeful."

The Rev. Barry W. Lynn, executive director of Americans United for Separation of Church and State, said a religious leader "should not be making callous political points while a man is struggling for his life."

"Pat Robertson has a political agenda for the entire world, and he seems to think God is ready to take out any world leader who stands in the way of that agenda," Lynn said in a statement.

Robertson spokeswoman Angell Watts said of critics who challenged his remarks, "What they're basically saying is, `How dare Pat Robertson quote the Bible?"'

"This is what the word of God says," Watts said. "This is nothing new to the Christian community."

In August, Robertson suggested on "The 700 Club" that American agents should assassinate Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, who has long been at odds with U.S. foreign policy. Robertson later apologized for his remarks, saying he "spoke in frustration."

Funny Stuff off my Phone

These are the text messages that I decided not to delete when I cleared my inbox today.

 

 

R' Freidman: "You are a sick nut" (duh)

Berger: "Shut up Ed" (another duh)

Mechanic: "You're a stupid and ugly slob and you smell like the fecal matter of an anchovie" (WTF? He was in inght seder when he sent it)

R' Friedman: "Use your noodles" (When did I ever do that)

Mechanich:Call me later I'm pooping (classic meyer)

 

We were at Aish Discovery today even though it was "No Torah Tuesday" so I texted Rabbi G and said can I take tomorrow off?

 

R' Granofsky's response: I dislike Idiots

Me: "Is that a yes or a know?"

R' Granofsky: "Don't be an Idiot please"

Me: "Ok but only since you said please"

Life is Like

Great line from Parsha Shiur today.

Rabbi Calek: "Life is like a movie and we always come late and leave early."
Me: "Well then how the hell are you supposed to know what's going on"

Optional Shiurim

     TONight after night Seder there was an optional shiur in beer bonging, and I learned all the shitas!!

Tonny told me to update....

so I did. SHabbos was fun with him in har nof. THe funniest thing was when the baby was puking and meir was catching t in his hand and he looked at us deadpan and was like iy"h by you guys. Kind of sick but really funny. TOday we had the nastiest cereal at breakfast. It looked like cookie crisp but tasted like  Pesach cerreal, very dissaponting! I went out for Dinner with Uriel the other night that was fun. We went to Shnty's and they had a new sauce. Last night GUsh went there and stole all their advertising magnets and then me and Meir beat him up and took them so I have 50 Shnity's magnets on my closet now.

Funny Joke:

We're sitting in shiur and Rabbi G. goes I once got asked who the first yeshiva bochur was Avraham Avinu or CHoni Hamagel. Avraham toured the entire land but CHoni slept for 70 years woke up went into the beis couldn't find his chavrusa and went back to sleep. So it seems like a tie right? But then I realied Avraham was misnaken Shacharis!


It made us laugh