Funny Stuff off my Phone

These are the text messages that I decided not to delete when I cleared my inbox today.

 

 

R' Freidman: "You are a sick nut" (duh)

Berger: "Shut up Ed" (another duh)

Mechanic: "You're a stupid and ugly slob and you smell like the fecal matter of an anchovie" (WTF? He was in inght seder when he sent it)

R' Friedman: "Use your noodles" (When did I ever do that)

Mechanich:Call me later I'm pooping (classic meyer)

 

We were at Aish Discovery today even though it was "No Torah Tuesday" so I texted Rabbi G and said can I take tomorrow off?

 

R' Granofsky's response: I dislike Idiots

Me: "Is that a yes or a know?"

R' Granofsky: "Don't be an Idiot please"

Me: "Ok but only since you said please"

Life is Like

Great line from Parsha Shiur today.

Rabbi Calek: "Life is like a movie and we always come late and leave early."
Me: "Well then how the hell are you supposed to know what's going on"

Optional Shiurim

     TONight after night Seder there was an optional shiur in beer bonging, and I learned all the shitas!!

Tonny told me to update....

so I did. SHabbos was fun with him in har nof. THe funniest thing was when the baby was puking and meir was catching t in his hand and he looked at us deadpan and was like iy"h by you guys. Kind of sick but really funny. TOday we had the nastiest cereal at breakfast. It looked like cookie crisp but tasted like  Pesach cerreal, very dissaponting! I went out for Dinner with Uriel the other night that was fun. We went to Shnty's and they had a new sauce. Last night GUsh went there and stole all their advertising magnets and then me and Meir beat him up and took them so I have 50 Shnity's magnets on my closet now.

Funny Joke:

We're sitting in shiur and Rabbi G. goes I once got asked who the first yeshiva bochur was Avraham Avinu or CHoni Hamagel. Avraham toured the entire land but CHoni slept for 70 years woke up went into the beis couldn't find his chavrusa and went back to sleep. So it seems like a tie right? But then I realied Avraham was misnaken Shacharis!


It made us laugh